In my earlier post, The Roger Huerta Book in 40 Words, I distilled my entire book down to a 40-word summary. This only took me 7 months.
Upon further examination, I’ve realized there was a phrase missing from the end of my distilled summary. I’ve added that phrase below in bold:
Michelle Lopez, a struggling writer, develops an intense interest in mixed martial arts (MMA) fighter, Roger Huerta. Believing he’s the man of her dreams, she sacrifices everything and travels 1200 miles from Denver, CO, to Pharr, TX, to meet him – only to discover he’s not the right man for her.
Ahh, that feels much better. That has closure. It also touches on a key issue at the root of this entire book – an issue which I’d been in complete denial about until recently.
I was looking (and am still looking) for a man who:
- is an alpha male
- makes me feel safe
- has something of substance to him
- is genuine, honest, and real
- actually respects women
While Roger slam-dunked items #1, #2, and #3 (he’s an alpha male who, indeed, made me feel very safe – and has more to him than meets the eye), he totally failed on items #4 and #5. Why, you ask?
Roger Huerta said 10 seemingly innocent little words about his wife-to-be that instantly revealed to me that he has zero respect for women.
You read that right. ZERO respect for women. None. Zilch. Which makes his so-called chivalrous act of “defending a woman” in that Austin street fight an act.
Sorry to break it to you ladies, but it’s all a scam. Roger Huerta’s “respect for women” doesn’t exist. You can’t say those 10 words about your fiancée, and have respect for women at the same time. It just doesn’t work that way.
It would be like me publicly saying “I love Justin Bieber,” but then calling him a faggot, a weakling, a horrible musician behind closed doors. (This is probably a bad comparison, but you get my point. And for the record, I do like Justin Bieber.)
When all is said and done, Roger wears a mask. He wears it all day long, every day. It’s a pretty handsome mask, but still a mask. I mean come on – if you wanna date/fuck/marry a mask, just hit up this guy. Probably less heartbreak involved.
If you want the real thing, you could gotta find a guy who has all his ‘parts’ aligned. You gotta find a guy who is his real, genuine self no matter where he is, who is watching, or what the consequences are.
Being your real self is no easy task. We live in a society that encourages people to blend into the masses and be like sheep. “Keep your head down, don’t question the status quo, BEHAVE, and you will fit right in.” Our society is steeped in media messages that tell us “Something is wrong with the real you,” and people start to believe it.
What a bunch of bullshit. That’s why I don’t listen to the MASSES, or watch TV, or allow anyone to dictate my future. =)
I’m here to say: If you try to be someone you’re not, life will ENSURE that you pay the consequences.
Oh, and if you don’t believe me that Roger has a secret mean side – just try getting to know him. Every person I’ve talked to who has spent considerable time with him acknowledges there’s a dark/mean side to him that the public is totally oblivious to. I personally have not witnessed his mean side, but I’m 100% sure I could not only handle it, but match it, and dis-arm it. Nothing about the guy scares me. Not even his worst sins, his worst flaws, could make me think he’s a lost cause.
I believe every problem is solvable. If Roger wants to solve his interpersonal problems, he can certainly do that. He’s the only one who CAN do it – but first he has to realize there’s a problem.
Why does everyone else see it, but Roger doesn’t? Why is everyone asking, “What is HAPPENING to this guy?” – but he’s not asking these types of questions? Xactly. It takes a so-called stalker to bring up these deep questions.
Now, it may seem like I bash him a lot, but Roger does have at least one redeeming quality, and it’s only fair that I mention it here: He was curious enough to take a huge risk – to step out of his shell of a shallow world for a brief moment (technically 1.25 hours) to see what would come of meeting me in person.
I’m not like any of his “circle of smiling clowns” – I don’t do the whole drug/alcohol/party scene, and I’d rather someone tell me their honest feelings than lie to me with politeness.
So for him to be curious, and to follow that curiosity – knowing I represented something “different” from his hollow world – that’s a good sign.
He didn’t meet me for “charity reasons” like he claimed in his interview – that’s a bunch of bullshit he made up to prop is ego up after I walked out on him. (What woman has the nerve to walk out on THE Roger Huerta, huh?) I gave him an easy way out of that dinner. He chose to meet me instead of taking it. I told him if he didn’t want to meet up with me, that was absolutely fine – I would explore the city of Austin on my own.
But he chose to follow his curiosity.
Curiosity is always a good thing. It’s the pathway to open-mindedness, and the more open your mind is, the more wisdom you can acquire from the Great Big Universe.
Closed minds don’t get wisdom. They get… uh… fecal matter. Shit. Just ask any close-minded asshole about the world, and you’ll get a bunch of crap in return.
Anyways, I know you’re probably curious as to what those 10 words were that Roger said. You’re probably wondering how in the heck 10 words could give me all the information I needed to know about what kind of man he really was – and how I decided Roger isn’t the right man for me.
You guessed it – it’ll all be in the book! It’ll be in that final climactic scene, the infamous dinner walkout scene that took place at Shady Grove in Austin, TX. The most awful 1.25 hours of my life, cuz I just sat there realizing, “I’ve been chasing an empty shell… I’ve been chasing a man who’s completely lost in this world. And what does that say about me?”
Sometimes you have to see another flawed human being to understand the unspeakable flaw that exists within yourself.